Q. Where can I find the full post about Michelle’s adoption discovery and your family’s adoption reunion?
A. You can read the full post about Michelle’s 2017 adoption discovery by Ancestry DNA test and our family’s adoption reunion story here.
Q. Why didn’t Michelle’s adoptive parents tell her she was adopted? Did she ever suspect she was adopted?
A. Despite statements made in 1976 and 1977 to secure the adoption, the adoptive parents never told Michelle she was adopted and clearly never intended to. Due to various circumstances within the adoptive family, she had no suspicion that she was adopted until after she received the DNA match to her sister Jamie. Looking back, Michelle has been able to identify numerous red flags that existed throughout her life. Unfortunately, over the course of forty years, an enormous number of lies were crafted to prevent Michelle from seeing these red flags and to purposely mislead her into believing she couldn’t be anything but their biological child. There are other issues that we don’t wish to discuss publicly, but there was obviously much more going on behind closed doors that contributed to all of this.
Q. Did anyone from Michelle’s adoptive family know she was adopted?
A. Yes. Virtually everyone in Michelle’s adoptive parents’ life at the time of the adoption knew she was adopted. Prior to the adoption, the adoptive parents had not told anyone (or very few people) about their plans to adopt–right up until the day they brought Michelle to their home. Even the adoptive grandparents and immediate family members were not told ahead of time. So when they suddenly had a newborn in their possession, it would have stood out to anyone who knew them (ex. family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, acquaintances, the mailman, etc.) Even if someone had not been told of the adoption directly, any reasonable person would have concluded that they adopted a baby considering there was no pregnancy. Over the years, numerous individuals had been told about the adoption directly or learned about the adoption through others. Even as recently as 2012 new individuals were told about Michelle’s adoption by her adoptive father. The only person who was never told was Michelle.
Q. Are you against all adoptions?
A. No, we are not against all adoptions. Adoption will always be necessary as long as there are children genuinely in need of permanent homes when no biological family members are able to provide the proper care for them. We do feel that newborn adoption in the United States (and elsewhere in the world) is very flawed and commodifies humans (another issue for another post.) However, we hope that by sharing our story, people considering adoption (either by placing a child for adoption or by adopting a child) will be more aware of any red flags in the process that could indicate something unethical is happening and needs to be investigated. We fully understand the desire for people to adopt, but adoption should never come at the expense of the child or disregarding the emotional needs of the biological parents, simply to fulfill the desires of the adoptive parent(s). This type of adoption is not something that only happened in the past. Unethical, coerced and illegal adoptions still take place today in the United States and all over the world. Educating others about these issues will always be one of our main priorities.
Q. I think my adoption was arranged through the same attorney.
A. Michelle’s adoption was arranged in 1976 by Edward Kent of the firm Kent, Grayer & Rosenberg located in Willingboro, New Jersey (Burlington County.) If you think your adoption might have been arranged by this firm we would love to hear from you. If you placed a child for adoption with this firm or adopted a child through this firm (or considered it but never went through with it) we would also love to hear from you.
Q. Where are the newspaper articles about the adoption attorney?
A. You can read the newspaper articles discussing the indictment against the adoption attorney here.
Q. Do you plan to write a book or develop a film about your story?
Q. I am a student / writer / teacher / journalist / producer researching an issue related to adoption. Are you available for an interview?
A. Yes. Please write to us to discuss your questions or areas of research. Thank you!